Another one in the books. We only had 5 of us this time, but we still managed to make our way through our normal 7 titles, which I have to admit was tough in a couple of them! But we’re professionals and we struggled through them to become stronger! Or something like that. Joining us this time out was our usual suspects: Neil Calderone, Brian Fukula, Tim Palace, and my T-Day co-pilot Aaron Christensen, making this event his 20^th anniversary of Turkey Day! While we did miss a few of our regulars, due to incoming bad weather and other such issues, we still had a good time. And probably ate way too much pizza.

Before we get to the films, I have to say there are a few in here that really define what I consider a Turkey. As we all know, it’s not a bad movie. It may not be well made, but damn if they weren’t trying. These are also films that “normal film fans” might turn their noses up at, thinking there are just silly. But every one of these, the makers of them, both in front of and behind, were doing their best to create something entertaining. And I think they succeeded… maybe some to a lesser degree than the others but succeeded none the less. Okay, let’s get to the movies!

Attack of the Giant Leeches (1959) – This is one of my favorite monster films of the ‘50s. Seeing this as a youngster, those titular terrors scared the crap out of me! This movie did just what it set out to do and that was create a low budget monster flick, with a fantastic title and creatures to match! Granted, the monsters were made out of raincoats glued together with some adhesive that was probably toxic, but they are still cool as hell.

In a little swamp town, people are starting to go missing. Could it be the weird creatures old Lem saw while he was out poaching? Or maybe Dave actually did kill his cheating wife and her side hustle? But we know with this title, we’re going to get to see some giant leeches, and we do! But in the meantime, it’s up to the new game warden Steve to figure out.

Produced by Roger and Gene Corman and directed by Bernard Kowalski, they give us such a fun time, filled with plenty of entertaining characters. We have a great cast of actors known for these kinds of films, such as Yvette Vickers, Michael Emmet, and Bruno VeSota. But it is the giant leeches that we’re here to see and I always thought they delivered.

Love Goddess of Blood Island (1963) – I got this title because of a couple of reasons. First, I had never heard of it and secondly, with a title like that, how could it be bad? It was one of three features on a release from Vinegar Syndrome, a set called Blood-A-Rama II, which also had Follow that Skirt (1965) and The Undertaker and His Pals (1966). This particular title was written by William Kerwin, the actor best known for appearing in H.G. Lewis’ Blood Feast and Two Thousand Maniacs. It’s about a pilot that gets stranded on said Blood Island, which is inhabited by six women, who spend their time bathing (in their shiny bikinis), dancing around in their bikinis, bathing some more, and then beating their male captive. Of course, they all take turns “sharing” him, but he’s so tired from being worked as a slave all day, it’s even harder to keep them satisfied!

The strangest thing about this film, if you can believe it, is the complete lack of nudity. For something that really feels like an exploitation film, and the plenty of opportunity for it, there’s nothing. But Kerwin did bring some gore that he learned from H.G. Lewis because there are a few sequences that are almost as over-the-top. It really makes the dragging footage of the constant dancing and bathing a little more bearable but then leaves you begging for more!

Not a film for everyone, but perfect for Turkey Day.

Rabid Grannies (1988) – One of the best things to come out of Belgium, if you’re looking for a movie that is in the same vein as Peter Jackson’s early efforts. The family of the excentric two wealthy ladies arrive at their mansion for their birthday party, only attending because they want part of the inheritance when the time comes. Each one, including the brother who is a priest, are not the nicest people out there. But when something happens to the old ladies, turning them into demonic monsters, it’s all for one!

This is a great example of ‘80s special makeup effects gone made! There’s plenty of over-the-top (and slightly humorous) gore, with plenty of blood flying, with each death more outrageous than the last. Written and directed by Emmanuel Kervyn, unfortunately his one and only feature film, but we get a good old-fashioned splatter film that will make you laugh, snicker, and maybe even trigger that gag reflex, but you will be entertained until the end.

Oasis of the Zombies (1982) – Now I had seen this zombie opus from Jess Franco at least twice before, but it had been several years since my last viewing. I figured it would be not only a perfect edition to the day’s lineup but might be the one to get the most groans. Once again though, I’m showed that as you get older, sometimes films aren’t as boring as you once thought they were, and you start to see different elements of “good” in them. Okay, I’m not saying Oasis is a great film by any means. But I am saying it’s nowhere near as terrible as I once thought. But it is still a solid entry into this year’s marathon.

The story is about an oasis in the middle of the desert that still might have a bunch of gold there from when there was a great battle against the Nazis during the war. But the area is haunted by the undead Nazi soldiers. How can that be a bad idea? The makeup on some of the zombies are pretty good, but since we see very similar closeup shots of the same zombie faces, over and over, and over again, the effectiveness starts to wear a bit thin. But no matter, Franco does give us some T&A, some gore, and plenty of wandering around to keep us entertained.

The Cat (1991) – It has to have been 30+ years since I’ve seen this title, so I had sadly pretty much forgotten about it until it was recently released on Blu-ray by 88 Films. And then it all came back to me, and I realized that the junkyard fight sequence between a dog and the alien cat is alone enough to qualify it to be in this marathon. But it gets even more outrageous.

The story is about a cop / writer who is on the trail of a couple of aliens and their cat, who are searching for another alien being that is set on destroying the planet. Pre CGI, it was amazing to see what some very inventive filmmakers would come up with when it created different effects. With some good old-fashioned trick photography, to even building a giant monster with plenty of teeth and goo that completely wipes out any humans it comes up against, it is never forgettable. That look back to those creative filmmakers always brings a smile to my face. And I know this title was probably the favorite of those attending. It also reminded me of some of the crazy films coming out of Hong Kong during that time and is an easy way to get lost going down that rabbit hole. But it will be a fun journey.

The Boneyard (1991) – This is another movie from that same year, that I never bothered with when it was released straight-to-video because with a giant poodle monster on the cover, and starring Phyllis Diller, how could it be entertaining, right? When I finally sat down with it a few years ago, boy did I realize how wrong I was. Like Rabid Grannies, this one has plenty of rubber monsters running amok at a county morgue that is soon to be closing. The director, James Cummings, had worked in the special makeup effects industry before, working on films like Dead & Buried (1981), The Beast Within (1982), The Thing (1982), and DeepStar Six (1989), so he knew how effects can work.

A city morgue is invaded by some sort of demonic creatures that cause holy hell with the people trapped in there, including Diller, playing Miss Poopinplatz!!! You also have Ed Nelson, a character that started his career with Roger Corman’s early monster flicks, and Norman Fell looking like a hippy coroner, and Deborah Rose playing a psychic who is trying to help the police. There is plenty of blood, goo, and demonic monsters running around, but it is even better when Diller, and her poodle get into the action! So much better than you’d expect.

Carnage (1984) – For our last film of the marathon, I decided to end it with an Andy Milligan pic, and even one of his older ones. I’ve said it before, but of Milligan’s work that I’ve seen, I’ve always been entertained. Sure, some of them may look like a high school play being filmed, but I’ve enjoyed each one of them, and way more than I had ever expected. Carnage is a modern-day haunted house movie where the previous owners both committed suicide and still remain in the house. The new couple start noticing things right away, such as objects moving when they aren’t looking, to almost dying overnight because the gas from the oven is mysteriously turned on. And if you’re a poor fool that decides to break into the house, I feel sorry for you!

There is plenty of low-budget and outrageous gore sequences that are a hoot, especially the hand getting cut off and the quick decapitation! While the actors do their best, with some dialogue is unintentionally funny, with one character basically telling her mother she’s a whore, it is a perfect way to end the day.

So, after 7 films, and way too many pizzas devoured to remember, Turkey Day 2025 comes to an end. Thanks to those that came out, even with the impeding snowstorm coming, and to my wife, Dawn and son, Nick, for creating some amazing pizzas, just like they do each and every time.